A window to the soul
by Lady Callie
Summary: Season One fic. Logan says goodbye to Max the only way he knows how. Get inside the mind of the man behind 'Eyes Only' in his personal notebook full of poetry and thoughts, most of which are about a certain young woman. Based on the tiny snippet of poetry
1. Forever eyes.

Disclaimer: FOX and Cameron/Elgee own all

Disclaimer: FOX and Cameron/Elgee own all. I wouldn't dream of stealing it from them.

Spoilers: Non if any from 'Shorties in Love'.

Author's notes: This is collection of poems and thoughts from Logan's poetry book. I was greatly inspired by the episode 'Shorties in Love' and I really wanted to know more about what Logan had hidden in that book of his, and this is my attempt. I promise that there will be more poems! I would really like to have a whole 'book full' of Logan's writing. Anyway, enjoy!

~*~*~*~

Forever eyes.

Dark.

Somebody's angel.

Gentle lips.

Full.

Angel soft.

Flowing hair.

Chocolate.

Silky strands.

Strong hands.

Smooth.

Long boned.

Graceful body.

Cream.

Catlike, dangerous.

Quick mind.

Clever.

Her own.

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	2. Parts of her.

Okay peeps

Okay peeps! Here's another poem from the secret book of Logan Cale! Enjoy! Note: This poem is similar to the first one, I just changed a few words around and made it more shipperish. For disclaimer, please see first page.

~*~*~*~

Forever eyes.

Dark.

Somebody's angel.

Catlike grace.

Smooth.

Someone's idea.

Brilliant mind.

Alive.

Her own.

Loyal heart.

Caring.

My joy.

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie 


	3. Max.

Hello again

Hello again! Here is yet another hidden Cale poem! This poem is more like Logan's random thoughts about Max, each thought or feeling starting with the letters of her name. Please note that I changed the spelling of a few words because there's not many words that start with the letter X! For disclaimers, please see first page. Enjoy!

~*~*~*~

M agnificent

A ngel

X tremely beautiful

My everything

A lso

X tra special

M anticore

A lone

X '5

M ust have

A lluring

X traordinary

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	4. Every little thing about her.

Aliight gang

Aliight gang! This chapter really isn't a poem at all, it's more like an entry in a diary. I wanted to show that Logan does notice the little things about Max, like what shirt she wore and what colors she likes and maybe a touch of what colors he likes on her. (Good idea Gwen!) For disclaimers see the first page. And a huge thanks to Queen Gwenyvere for being my beautiful beta! Enjoy! 

~*~*~*~ 

Today she wore the powder blue V-neck shirt. Yesterday it was the red sweater with her leather jacket. Maybe tomorrow it'll be the pretty gray three and one-forth inch. Or it could be the black turtleneck. She likes that one. She wears it often. 

If the weather warms up, she might wear her black tanktop, the one the shows off her muscular arms. Or maybe her 'Girls Kick Ass' T-shirt that I've heard so much about. I think Original Cindy gave that to her, although I've never seen her wear it. I wonder why? 

Maybe she'll decide on the dark purple top, the one that hugs her every curve. And there's always the soft tan top with the drawstring bottom and the hood.

I guess I'll just have to wait till tomorrow to find out. There's only eleven hours and twenty-nine minuets left…….. 

~*~*~*~ 

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks! 

-LadyCallie


	5. Something about you.

Hey gang

Hey gang! Thanks for reading this far! And thanks for all the great reviews! Aiight, in this poem, Logan speaks about the something in Max that he loves. For disclaimers see first page. And a cyber hug to Queen Gwenyvere for beta'ing for me. Thanks Gwen! Enjoy everyone!

~*~*~*~

Something about you,

Stirs long forgotten feelings

Of fulfillment and purpose in my life.

Your spirit,

So bright and lively,

Warms my heart.

Your brilliant mind,

And quick sense of humor,

Delight and amaze me.

Your uncertain future 

And whatever it may bring, 

I wish to share it all with you 

Something about you,

Drives me crazy,

I yearn to hold you and keep you.

Something about you,

Makes me love you.

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	6. If only...

Hi all

Hi all! Here is another "lyrical pen scratching." LOL! This one is really short and quite dark compared to the other poems, it's supposed to be that way. Logan was depressed and sad when he wrote this poem and the harshness reflects those feelings. Got it? Aiight! For disclaimers see first page. Enjoy everyone! And thanks to Queen Gwenyvere for being my angel beta!

~*~*~*~

If only you would open your heart to me.

If only you would see yourself as more then a killing machine.

If only…

If only I could walk again.

If only I could tell you how I feel about you.

If only…

If only things were different.

If only things were perfect.

If only…

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	7. Today in the life of Logan Cale.

Hey folks

Hey folks! In this entry, Logan starts out talking about his day and his Eyes Only work, but soon he turns his thoughts to a certain young woman. ::wink wink grin:: For disclaimers see first page. Thanks again to my beta boo, Queen Gwenyvere. As always, enjoy!

~*~*~*~

Today was a good day, though it would have been better if I had finished working on that Eyes Only story before I had to stop and fix dinner for Max and myself. She would have been extremely ticked off if she came over and I hadn't made anything to eat. Nothing gets between Max and dinner, except Zack. But I will NOT get into that subject again.

Where was I? Oh yes, dinner with Max. She's been coming over more often recently, sometimes she'll drop by in the early afternoon just to say "Hi" and maybe make dinner plans. Or she'll come in for a quick snack during a hot run that's in the area. So I now keep a box of chocolate cookies or fresh fruit in the kitchen just for her. Max adores chocolate. She'd probably die if I ever made her my great-great grandmother's triple layer fudge cake with chocolate toffee chip frosting. I'll have to remember that for next time.

Oh shit! Look at the time! I've got to complete this Eyes Only case so it's ready to broadcast in the morning.

-Logan.

~*~*~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie 


	8. She's gone.

Hey peeps

Hey peeps! I was so shocked at the season finale that I went on a writing spree! I would have had this up sooner, but I felt that this still need some work, so I didn't. This entry is based on Logan's first thoughts after he finds out about loosing Max. Thanks to my beta boo Queen Gwenyvere. For disclaimers see first page. As always, enjoy!

~*~

She's gone. Dead. K.I.A. Murdered by a clone of herself. An X-7. A soldier like herself, only without feelings. A mindless drone. A vision of what she could have been.

She's gone and so is Zack. An updated breed of killers shot him down. A copy of the X-5's. And they were only children. Yet they managed to murder the top of the X-5 class.

She's gone and I never got to say goodbye.

~*~

What did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below. Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	9. Only Darkness.

This entry is set a few days after the attack on Manticore and Logan struggles to deal with the lost of Max

This entry is set a few days after the attack on Manticore and Logan struggles to deal with the lost of Max. Again thanks to Queen Gwenyvere for beta'ing. For disclaimers see first page. Enjoy!

~*~

Dark. Black. Empty. Cold. Still. Lifeless. Soundless. Blank. Quite. Devoid of life. No joy. No happiness. No peace. No music. No dreams. No sleep. No laughter. No beauty. Only Darkness.

My life without Max.

- Logan Cale

May 24th, 2020

~*~

Well what did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


	10. Without her.

This poem is set a few days after the events of "…And Jesus bought a Casserole"

This poem is set a few days after the events of "…And Jesus bought a Casserole". Logan is getting over the shock of Max's death and is struggling without her. Disclaimers are on the first page. And another cyber hug to QueenGwenyvere for being my beta. Enjoy!

~*~

Without her there's no sun.

Without her there's no light.

Without here there's no point.

Without her there's no goal.

Without here there's only darkness.

Without her there's only pain.

Without her there's emptiness.

Without her there's only me.

~*~

Well, what did you think? Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie 


	11. A Final Goodbye.

This is a chapter from my 'Window to the Soul' story, but I thought it could stand-alone as well, so I'm posting it separately

Aiight peeps, this is my baby. I worked hard on this one and I really liked how it turned out. Thanks to my beautiful beta Queen Gwenyvere for working her magic on this story. All disclaimers are on the first page. NOTE: This is set right after the Season Finale ended, when Logan was sitting on top of the Needle. Yes, I'm backtracking a little, but you'll understand why when you read it. I know it's really late to be posting Finale fics, but I want to wait till the rush of stories died down. NOTE 2: Logan is talking to Max as if she's right there with him in this chapter and the next. Just so you know.

~*~ 

I can't do it. I just can't go on living another day without you Max.

That's why I'm holding this gun, the gun I tried to give you so long ago, to my head. The coolness of the metal chills my hand and temple, but it won't matter in a moment. I'll be with you in a moment Max.

I never got to say goodbye to you Max. I never got to tell you that I love you. So before I pull the trigger and join you in the bliss of death, I'll shout my goodbye from the top of the Needle, for the whole city to hear. I'm already standing there, heights no longer scare me. This was your favorite place, besides my apartment. You felt save here, you could think and not have to worry about anyone bothering you. I feel safe here too. About to be at peace, with you again.

"Goodbye Max! I loved you!" 

****

*BANG* 

~*~ 

Well, what did you think? Please don't hurt me! If you liked or hated please leave me a review in the box below!

-LadyCallie


	12. *BANG*

This story takes place right after the last chapter. Disclaimers at the bottom of the page.

*BANG*

__

"You want to feel sorry for your bad self, be my guest."

"I'm sorry, Logan."

"Are you okay?"

"Because you've been acting really strange and I've been worried."

"What do you need?"

"You don't have to tell me to be afraid. I'm already there."

"I'm supposed to be a revved-up girl. Truth is, I'm a lemon."

"Logan... Don't leave me."

"There's something I've got to tell you. I should've said something a long time ago."

"I'm sorry."

"You won't leave?"

"Promise?" 

"Time heals all wounds, right?"

"If you die on me, I'll kick your ass."

"You thinking what I'm thinking?"

"This will wait, right?"

"There's always tomorrow."

Oh God! Max, I'm so sorry! I'm sorry I wasn't there in time to save you, I'm sorry I didn't try harder. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough. Oh Max! I'm sorry! What have I done?

I told myself, when I found you in my apartment scared to death that I'd killed myself, that I'd never do anything like that again. That I'd never be the one to make you scared like that again. And look at me now. Standing on top of the Needle with a gun to my head. I drop the gun and it hits the cold steel of the Space Needle with a loud bang.

You wouldn't want me to do this, would you Max? You saved me before and you just saved me again. I can't believe I almost pulled the trigger. But can you understand Max? Understand why I almost ended my life? It's so hard to live without you. You were my guiding light, my truest friend, my would be lover, my everything. You were my angel, Max. 

Maybe you still are. Maybe you're my guardian angel, watching over me from above. I like that thought, that wherever you are, you're watching me, ready to beat on my ass if I step out of line. I guess tonight was a warning.

Okay Max, I'll behave. I'll keep living and I'll try to remember what you told me. But don't feel afraid to drop by sometime, aiight? 

~*~

Did you really think I'd kill Logan? Muhahahaaaaaa! Well, I almost did, but I just couldn't because we (the watchers) know Max is alive and it's only time before Logan finds that out. And I still have a few ideas for more poems! All quotes, dialogue and characters belong to FOX. Thanks to www.darkangelfan.com for the transcripts to the episodes and Queen Gwenyvere for her wonderful work as beta boo. You were right Gwen, killing Logan wasn't a good idea.. **NOTE 2**: I've had this written for a very, very long time, and I just noticed that I hadn't posted it! My bad! L **NOTE 3**: This is the last chapter to date. Season Two hasn't given me anything at all to work with...... damn that virus. But if I do start again, it will be posted! Promise!!!!!

Please leave me a review in the box below! Thanks!

-LadyCallie


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